Arizona Loves Barry

Dear Arizona:

Barry was available in the offseason. Word had it that there were not any teams but San Francisco that were interested in adding Baroid, his list of demands, or his acidic effect on the clubhouse.

You should have pursued him since it is now evident after this
weekend’s lovefest shows how willing you are in assisting his name into the record books above Hank Aaron’s.

The Arizona Diamondbacks pitched to Barry Bonds this weekend and afforded him homeruns two games in a row (#739 and #740) bringing him 15 homers away from Hank Aaron’s naturally earned home run record of 755.

At this juncture, the only folks that love Bonds more than the D-Backs are those geeks that sit waiting in the frigid waters outside AT&T Park in their little canoes waiting for him to send a ball into the drink. When a ball hits the water there is a flurry of paddles spanking the water that is reminiscent of dropping a handful of minnows into a fish farm tank. Then you have the uber geeks that will actually leave the freezing comfort of their kayak to swim like Gilligan to grab the ball.

Seven bucks. That’s roughly the price of a baseball. And that’s if you have to have a good one.

But I digress.

Note to teams on San Francisco’s schedule. Don’t pitch to Bonds. Look at that roster and you’ll see my point.


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