Tracking Tony Kornheiser’s Fantasy Sports Team

Last week, I commented on ESPN’s Monday Night Football B Team announcing team.  Tonight, I was given a topic on a silver platter by Disney’s Monday Night Football A Team during the second week matchup between the Pittsburgh Steelers and Jacksonville Jaguars.

I tuned into tonight’s game in the 3rd quarter and as I was pulling dinner I heard Tony Kornheiser, ESPN’s version of Dennis Miller with a bit more sports cred, identify and cheer for players that were on his fantasy team.

Note that I said players. Plural. He commented more than once.

Tony, I’d like to be gentle with this, but we really don’t care.  Any respectable sports dude has fantasy players playing on any given NFL game.  We all pick games.  I have been known to announce to my son anytime one of my fantasy players or teams accomplish something that scores me points.  But honestly, that’s just to get on his nerves.

I found out tonight that it really works well (getting on nerves), ‘cuz the sound of some dude that should sound like he’s been there before tying up my TV audio cheering his fantasy players was mui irritating.

It couldn’t have been on a cue card either, because it didn’t have a tag after it where Kornheiser followed up with something to the effect of, “and I play fantasy sports on”.

I understand that Kornheiser is supposed to be the loose cannon that you never know what will roll out of his pie hole.  But since it’s TV, we have to listen to his weak ramblings and then have the additional burden of looking at him also.  Let me admit that I’m fortunate my success is not based on my looks, but I also did not choose television as a vocation.  I’ve got a face made for the internet ie, it’s very Photoshoppable.  Plus Frappers, you all know you were thinking it.

Deep in the 4th quarter Kornheiser then invoked the name of Howard Cosell.  What’s the significance of that?  I really can’t tell you because I have no clue what it means, or is supposed to mean.  Uh, maybe he just wants us to know he’s been watching tape of Cosell.  I am clueless for the first time since you’ve known me my little Frappers.

This fantasy homerism did not spoil the game with the Jags blanking the Steelers 9-0.  It just tempts me to turn down the TV sound and turn on anything else short of Pavarotti.

By the way, I have Byron Leftwich on my fantasy team.

And I picked the Jags to win.


2 thoughts on “Tracking Tony Kornheiser’s Fantasy Sports Team

  1. Thanks to last nights telecast,those who are enthralled with Tony’s team, like myself, can add to his depth chart Alge Crumpler. I just wish he would go into more depth about his league as I am interested in the scoring methodology. He must get alot of points for 3 yard out patterns becuase he gets real excited about every one.


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