Red Sox fan = Turret’s Syndrome sufferer
Let me set the scene for you:
I’m sitting in a sports restaurant in Herndon Virginia Monday night watching the deciding game in the Angels/Yankees matchup. There are three Angels fans, including myself at my table. The air is tense because we’ve already made our allegiance known by shouting YES! And other typical dude utterances at inappropriate decibal levels.
Then the Yanks score and there’s a lot of boisterous standing up and yelling at our direction, as if they’d won the series in that early inning. Yankee fans are the same no matter where you go.
Then, just as the roar dies down, one lone voice is heard in the corner blurting out, “RED SOX!!!.”
The whole packed place began to roll in laughter.
The rest of the week, my colleagues and I (the intelligent Halo Fans) would randomly blurt out “RED SOX!!!” whenever it was quiet and then laugh our brains out like we were 11. Yeah, I know I’m 43, but some things are just funny at the time. I don’t care who you are.
BoSox fan is like a kid that’s been neglected for most of his life. Then he does something special and gets love like he’s never experienced before. And then he’s quickly forgotten again. Then he desperately seeks the attention high he knew before by doing smooth things like yelling out, “RED SOX!!!” in a restaurant where he’s the lone loser.
If you’re scratching your head thinking this is not funny, just trust me, it is. And I haven’t let you down yet.